How an adult mind works is often shaped by what it has experienced when he/she was a child…. Read on to know more!!
As an adult how we react to certain people and how we lead our daily lives are often the reflection of our subconscious mind which might have experienced something ugly in our past or adolescence which we do not want to face but lock them up deep, somewhere in our minds where they take the shape of fear and anger and sometimes aggressive behavior.
Often it is seen that men torture women after marriage or when in a private affair and they tend to become possessive of their girlfriends and then physically harm them. It becomes a threat to their partner’s life.
Why is it so that those men are the way they ARE? When men are young as a boy they imbibe what they see around them, if they see their mother getting tortured, two things can happen:- Either they will empathize with their mother and start developing a hatred for their father figure, Or they might start idolizing their father, and later may take pride in torturing their wives too.
So, it is really important to see how our child’s psychology is getting affected by what they see and what they listen to. It is extremely important that we keep a close watch to our child’s activities, the way they speak, the way they do certain things.
People with criminal minds have been known to have developed psychopath intuitions from a very young age. Like hurting another peer or child and taking pleasure out of it. Getting hurt and not reacting to it, just staring blindly. All these could be a sign of child psychology going in some other direction than it is supposed to. It is recommended to see a child psychologist then and there and try and work with your child to avoid such incidents where they might come across violence from a very young age.
Keep them warm with love and care, and not always protecting them by keeping them isolated or confined within boundaries and away from friends. Let your child explore but under your supervision.
The above statement is not only applicable for the male child, but also for the female child. If a female child has been the victim of domestic violence from a very tender age, they end up hating the entire “Men” kind and would refrain from getting involved with them at any stage of life.
Even when they do during their adulthood, the underlying fear of becoming victim to another domestic violence or physical threat comes to the surface. Where they are scared of commitment and cannot trust easily on people, especially men. It is very difficult to gain their trust, and they slowly start opening up to a person in whom they confide with their fear, their dreams and failures, and a much deeper aspect of life.
If their trust is broken, the “Women” of that kind will be “broken” forever. Nothing can repair their damaged soul and the same is with “Men” of a certain kind who have been raised in a vulnerable environment. Our disappointments come to surface, when the similar incidents from our childhood get triggered in front of us, and we lose ourselves to reality hoping to cope with the social pressure which has made people categorize in certain “types” to which we cannot fit ourselves and end up being socially awkward.
There are more sides to “men” and “women” and their stories. They just learn to live and get accustomed to this world and society standards, otherwise people will call them sick, mental and what not. That’s not what they are, they just have a different way of doing things and their thought process is not the same as ours.
They are careful and cautious of not getting themselves caught in the mess that they were long back. We just need to give them time to be themselves instead of forcing them to be someone they are not.
Disclaimer (Points mentioned are my own opinion, I am not a psychologist, consult a child psychologist if required, the statements made below are just my observations. These shouldn’t be implemented without consulting a professional child psychologist)