It’s been eight months since I last dated someone or had a girlfriend. I’m not sad or complaining about it. In fact, I’m quite happy being this way.
I know it sounds really stupid to count the number of days or months or years you have been single but it’s quite an achievement for a guy like me who has previously been single for just 7-8hours. 😐
Yeah! I’m not joking… Someone said it right when he/she said, “The Strongest Drug that Exist for a Human is an Another Human Being.” Dating more than 30 women over last 6years, I make a new record every minute now. 😂
However, I’m not here to explain about what went wrong and why I broke up with all the girls. Neither ‘am I trying to promote this kind of dating style. I’m here to talk about why I stopped being this “Frequent-Dating Guy” I used to be and how I managed to do it.
Off late, I realized that I never loved any of the girls that I previously dated. I was just fascinated about having someone whom I can call a girlfriend, hold hands and go around with. Or maybe it was just me trying to cover up my loneliness or fulfill my ego. Or maybe I was just addicted to having someone beside me all the time. It looked a lot like Love at that very moment, but it was not love but just an Addiction. This kind of behavior not only screwed up my image in front of people but also it spoilt my relationship with someone who could have been a great friend. Apart from that, there were heartbreaks which I was solely responsible for.
I still don’t know what made me realize my mistake but one fine day I just decided to stop being this way. I needed to change my ways of dealing with things because I started believing in having more permanency and stability in life.
As I said that it was an addiction, I would be lying if I say that it was a Walk in the Park. To be honest, it was literally like trying to quit some sort of drugs that I have been consuming over the years. I felt angry, frustrated and sad all at the same time. There were days when I just slept all day skipping meals after meals. There were times when I would just roam around on the streets and go miles away from home. There were situations when I had to look at myself in the mirror and say “Fuck! You’re not doing this again!”
Family members, Friends and Social Media also helped me in disguise. I had my brother with me all the time who made sure I was never left alone. Sometimes when I felt too restless, I would speak to my Mum, Dad, Sisters and Friends which would help me gain composure. I shared a lot of memes on social media (checkout my profile for that) because I believed making others smile might help me feel better. Already I’ve made a lot of people cry. I started working out which was like a part of the therapy and helped me a lot.
Thankfully, I got over that phase. Or you could say I came out clean. I now no more feel the need of having someone beside me all the time and feel happy in my own company. I prefer Mental and Eternal Bond over those relationship goals they post on Facebook.
But its not just me who have been through this phase. Most of us tend to get into relationships or date someone just because we feel lonely. We’re dependent on someone to be with us and love us all the time. We never realize that we should first learn to love ourselves which would attract people to love us with all their hearts.
Just like happiness and sadness, loneliness is also a feeling which comes and goes after a while. Sometimes it might be the toughest one to deal with. It makes us commit mistakes and then regret it later on.
The best way to deal with loneliness is not to hibernate but go out there and be surrounded with people who love us (Parents, Siblings and Friends) or doing things that you love to do. Rather than longing for companionship, start being your own companion and start loving yourself. True love will find way into your life.